Mini Review: The Procession To Calvary – An Absurdist Point-And-Click Quest That Will Split Your Sides

Death to Heavenly Peter!

The very first moment you lay eyes on The Procession To Calvary you’ll probably be reminded of the iconic British comedy series Monty Python, thanks to the use of cut-up, pre-existing classical artwork. However, while this is a huge part of the game’s visual appeal, its sense of humour is actually more unique than that, and it often challenges genre favourites such as Monkey Island and Sam & Max when it comes to absurdist jokes and belly laughs. In fact, we’d even dare to say that, in its funniest moments, The Procession To Calvary (named after the Pieter Bruegel the Elder painting of the same title) even manages to surpass those titles.

The game is essentially a point-and-click adventure that uses the analogue stick and buttons rather than the Switch’s touchscreen – a system that works perfectly well, despite the misgivings we initially harboured. You assume the role of a female warrior who is tasked with ridding the land of the murderous despot Heavenly Peter, but actually getting within a sword’s swipe of Pete is a challenge; you’ll have to solve puzzles, help NPCs, run errands and all of the other good stuff that point-and-click adventures are famed for.

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